Monday, March 12, 2007

Why I Hate You... Big Head Edition

The series continues with the people who live to ruin Monday.

The Scene: 6 train platform at Grand Central-42nd st, 8:30am

The platform is *surprise* packed and a full train rolls up. People shuffle to the door waiting for others to get off the train so they can shove on. I get to the door and the train is completely full so I resolve to wait for the next train. I can feel the lady's bag behind me poking me in the rear as the train pulls away inches from my face. I tried to step back a little, but this lady is up against me. I turn to see how many people are on the platform.... behind the woman who is poking me with her bag there is 15 feet of NO ONE!

Confused, I turn and ask her to step back a little and this is how THAT turned out:

Me: Pardon me, could you just step back a little bit?
Pokey: (insert immediate attitude) No. Why don't you move instead of pushing me?
Me: Lady, I'm just about to fall onto the tracks. (seriously, I was on the edge in the yellow zone!) Could you just move a little?
Pokey: (sucks teeth) Well, maybe you should've thought about that when you moved there.
Me: I was trying to get on the train. It's kind of how that happened and I really don't want to wind up on the tracks.
Pokey: (now she's J. Lo.) That's stupid. I'm not going to push you.... Why don't YOU get out of the way if you are uncomfortable?
Me: Lady! Forget it.

I turned back around (okay, maybe with a little hair flip) with the train rolling in, completely pissed that she thinks she's right when I hear her talking about me!

Pokey: Can you believe her? Some people. And her big head.
Patron: (nodding) Mmmm hmmm.

What are you nodding at?! This woman and every idiot on this platform is insane!

Let me tell you something, Pokey... if I was going down I would've grabbed a handful of your fake red ponytail and you'd be coming with me.


CraniumMaximus said...

Of the many insults possibly slung from one man to another, a couple certainly involve heads.

D***head, yes. F***head, of course. But that's where men draw the line.

And yet, at least two contributors to this site have reported the "big head" insult, if it can be taken seriously enough to be considered an insult, tossed their way at some point. Notably, neither of these contributors has a larger than average head. So what is it about the larger head that women find insulting?

Wrathos said...

What was the other "big head" insult?

BigBlogginNoggin said...

The other "big head" comment wasn't on the site. I've just been told of this affliction by another post-er.