From Overheard In New York, entitled "This phone stinks. The reception is really shitty."
Clerk lady #1: So, like, my kid dropped my cell into the toilet last week.
Clerk lady #2: Oh yeah?
Clerk lady #1: I had to recharge it for over a week before it worked.
Clerk lady #2: Hmm.
Clerk lady #1: When I made a call to my friend, it was all static. And the buttons didn't work. A few days later my kid picks the phone up and says: "I threw your cell in the toilet! Ha ha!"
Guy: ...you took it out of the toilet first, right?
--Duane Reade, 49th & 9th
[Ed. - I'm just hoping she Purelled before manhandling my swiffer wipes.]